Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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