Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
