Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
