I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
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