sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
