I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
