try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
