She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize