Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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