We're like a lot better than the average bears
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
