Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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