He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
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There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
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It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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