Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(312): View more from Illinois

I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.

Fav 387 131649 5108
share tweet
(815): View more from Illinois

My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.

Fav 14 994 3397
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(443): View more from Maryland

My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.

Fav 36 2997 1348
share tweet
(701): View more from North Dakota

I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.

Fav 9 3760 968
share tweet
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(619): View more from California

just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.

Fav 16 5580 1137
share tweet
(818): View more from California

That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff

Fav 33 1026 8727
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(925): View more from California

Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?

Fav 35 2350 5660
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(213): View more from California

hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"

Fav 17 1340 1251
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(561): View more from Florida

I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon

(850): View more from Florida

Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found

Fav 4 1138 672
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT