I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
