Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
