drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize