It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
