hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
