She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions