If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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