I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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