im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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