We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize