im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
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It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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