Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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