Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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