Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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