Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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