We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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