Are we in a gay sports bar?
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
