Yo dont text me then not text me
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
