Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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