There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
