I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
