id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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