i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
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Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
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God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
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