no. you can't hotbox the world.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
