i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Randomize
