Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
