I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
