I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Randomize