His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize