God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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