One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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