yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children