I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.