That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
