Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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