where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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