remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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