i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
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just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
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I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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